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Thursday, September 2, 2010

A Man can Mess Up Trying to be Good

You know sometimes a man can be trying to do good and mess up big time. Let me tell you about a recent experience with this.

Just like dog’s piss on tree’s to mark their territory women will leave shit behind. My girlfriend was over last night and I noted that she had in her hands when she came in the door her purse and some hair spray. She placed them on the counter and I would see them every time I got up to go get a beer. It was some white rain hair spray.

So everything is going great if you get my drift and I get the urge to go to the restroom. My medicine cabinet is open and I notice some hand cream and hairspray in it. I know I don’t buy the stuff so I figure it is hers and she left it there from another stay over. I grab it and walk to the living room and say hey baby I think you left this the last time you where here thinking I have saved her some money. She said, well honey you just screwed up as this is not my stuff, but I will say Bambi must have class, as this is the expensive stuff.

Well it got a little cold for a little while and it took me a little while to dig out of that hole. She finally said it would be best if I just shut up because you are not doing anything but digging a bigger hole. So anyway, she left this morning and a few minutes ago I noticed she left that hair spray behind on the counter. She had just left so I could have called her and had her come back to get it. But you know what, that stuff is going into the trash with the other. As I am not taking the chance of making the same mistake again. So when you read this get up and go check your bathroom for little land mines that have been left behind and “never” ask a woman if something in there is hers. Throw that stuff in the trash and if by some chance you forget and she finds something, deny knowing where in the hell it came from. Cause Men are dumb as rocks. Repeat that 10 times a day to her and you should do okay.

Hey I wonder if this line would work? Well baby I am a good host. You know just like you go out and get a six when I come over because you know I like beer; I buy women stuff so you will have it when you come. Naw, wouldn’t work. Next question would be well that is sweet of you but why has some been used? Throw it away now.

Art Nalley
Redneck Heritage Network
@ 9/31/04

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