Bubba on Life and Karaoke

It’s the morning after a night of Karaoke and I just sitting around reflecting back on the good time I had last night. It was during this reflection that I realized I have never done a story about the experience of Karaoke.

For a long period of my life I very seldom went to a bar for entertainment even thou much of my teen life was spent at one dancing the night away. I would have much rather just spent the night watching television and cooking out being in bed some where close to 8. For a short time after my divorce I went to a few bars but found the music had changed a lot and my social skills needed work.

So I signed up for match.com to meet some women but still very seldom took them to a bar. I took them to eat, the river or a movie and then a big event happened in my life that changed a lot. I got throat cancer and couldn’t talk much at all. Went thru about 9 weeks of radiation treatment that basically deep fried my throat and during most this time it was get treatment go home and go to bed.

As the effects starting wearing off and I got a little energy I ask my doctor one day will my voice ever come back as my voice is very important to making a living? He said it may never be the same as it was but it will come back you just have to push it to make it come back strong. So I thought about how to go about that and realized the best way to do it was to sing. Especially those songs that make you go thru several vocal ranges. So I would sit at the computer play my music and sing. Blues, Country, Hip Hop, Rap whatever my voice could do that night and it sounded terrible but the voice after getting a very sore throat would come back just a little stronger each time. I had recently broken up with my girlfriend and really didn’t feel like finding a replacement any time soon. I found that after a while you can only watch so much Godfather and Rocky movies till you start to get bored and look for something to do. So I started thinking about going to the local Karaoke bar for some entertainment.

At first I would go and just sit and watch not yet quite drunk enough or brave enough to get up and sing. And most people at the point would say why not Bubba those Karaoke singers if that is what you want to call singing can’t sing any better. You see when most people hear the word Karaoke they think of American Idol clips where they show those really bad singers for entertainment. But let me tell you quickly that has not been my experience. Sure you will get a few of them in around midnight who are trying a new song and too drunk to see the words but the majority of the regulars could have been a professional if they had looked differently, been younger or had been given a better hand in the game of life.

They are lovers of music and lyrics and each sings songs that reflect on their life at the moment. You can tell a lot about a person by their selection of a song to sing. Up to the mike is that little country girl who will not look at the crowd cause she is so nervous and just flat scared to death. She starts singing and you can’t believe how beautiful and strong a voice that little frame has. She hears the crowd saying wow listen to that and you can see her confidence build. By the end of the song you feel like you are watching a Gretchen Wilson concert as she struts her stuff and works the crowd. And then there is the mechanic who sings 16 tons perfectly. There is this tall black guy that can sign every Temptations song there is. I could go on and on but let’s just say there is a whole group of very different characters that come out nightly singing a wide variety of songs. And then you have what we call those one hit wonders. They know and sing one song very well but after a while that one song gets old.

Blues, Country, Rock and Roll, Rap it is all the same to a singer as it is the lyrics first and then the music man. Even if you don’t see yourself ever getting on stage just buy yourself a Karaoke disk of you favorite songs and play it on your TV reading the words. You will soon realize those songs are about either what you are or what you wish you were. They are about common experiences we have all been thru in life. One I like to sing that the crowd seems to love lately is a song by Trace Adkins titled Songs About Me. It really pushes your voice. A guy asks him in the song what he does for a living and he says I sing Country mixed in with a little Rock and little blues. The guy says what ever made you want to sing songs like that! And he says…..

I just looked at him and laughed and said cause they are songs about me and who I am, songs about living and loving and good hearted women and family and God. They are all songs about me, songs about meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

And as everyone that knows me knows me is one of my favorite folks!

So getting back to my beginnings of singing Karaoke every new person starts with what they know. I thought I understood comedy and I knew I understood Divorce. The voice was still very weak and would go in and out when trying to reach certain ranges. Lung capacity was not the best either. So I needed to work the voice, I enjoyed the company and felt they would not care too much about voice as long as I made them laugh I would be popular. So I finally got up one night and turned in a song. It’s title was You ain’t leaving thank God are you. It is a divorce song and the crowd really loves it especially one part which goes like this:

Till Death do us part, that is what she told that preacher man, now she says this ain’t worth dying for, you know she has had all she can stand. She boxed up Momma’s China it loaded on the truck, she just got started packing and I am thinking well this could SUCK!

Now because I bathed and could listen fairly well I had a few of those one tooth wonders hitting on me every time I would go singing so I had to figure out a way of letting them know I may be a country boy but I still got standards. At the time a real popular song was Redneck Woman by Gretchen Wilson. Cletus Judd came back with a Parody called “Paycheck Woman” that solved the problem. So the KJ and I made a pack one night that every time a woman sang Redneck Woman he would put me up next singing Paycheck Woman.

I want a paycheck check woman, don’t want welfare broad all the chicks I date are lazy I say hey ya’ll get a job!

The men in the room absolutely loved that song and the one tooth wonders did not come around anymore. This song was my beginning to being a person that people actually walked up to and asked if I was going to sing tonight. You know you have the singers respect when they quit talking to listen to you sing. They would say hey you going to sing about that Paycheck woman tonight?

In a carpet mill or a truck stop even if it is for minimum wage. You can hang buck naked from a big brass pole as long as you making tips.

So I was about to break out into more types of music when I ran across my next song on a Karaoke disk I had purchased to learn some songs by Meryl Haggard. There was a song on it sang by someone I had never heard of whose title was Hillbillies. I loved the lyrics (Remember it is the lyrics man) and it really pushed your voice. The idea being to sing others the rest of night and really blow out your voice singing Hillbillies right before you leave.

Hillbillies do it in the hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Tractors pulled out in the yard
I say you and me take it down to the barn
Bring some of that chicken and some of that pie
We could be there all night long
You know how we get it on
Cause Hillbillies love it in the hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

I had dated a few women during this time but none all that interested in going out for a night of Karaoke but then I started dating this woman who lived out in Clay clean over the other side of town. She really liked this singer named Josh Turner and he sang this song called No Rush. She would play it over and over any time she got the chance so after a while I had it down in my head. I go to pick her up one night and she asks if it would be okay to go to a local bar and meet some friends of hers. I said yeah sure and it just so happens the place is doing Karaoke that night. I was a little nervous thinking about singing in front of her co-workers as she has a habit of bragging on me and making me sound just a little better then I actually am. I figured start off with something easy (no large vocal changes) and do something new to me. You can only get better as the night goes on and you start singing the songs you know and have done a couple hundred times. So the first Song I sang on a date with Genny was No Rush by Josh Turner. Real low deep voice and easy to sing.

No Rushhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Nooooooooo Rush, we got forever baby just making up.
Bring it on down to the speed of love, Nooooooo Rush.

I don’t remember what her friends thought about it but do remember that Genny was very impressed and I had now hooked her on Karaoke. She started singing on her way home every night practicing songs and she has a very good voice. She would not sing however in the beginning with out me there as back up. I didn’t mind as this now means I get to sing twice as much. First my song then a song with her for her song. But now I have to learn some duets and how to harmonize. Blending two voices’ is a lot harder then one would think. Practice, Practice and more Practice. One night I am singing (I always get lucky with you) and she walks up and sings into the mike with me. Our first Duet. Only it was not written as a duet. We do several songs like that . She sings one part, I sing another and then we both sing other parts. It is unusual to see someone do that when the song was not written as a duet so the crowd tends to like it. So we had to get to work learning what were to become our signature songs as Duet’s.

Jackson by Johnny Cash and June Carter
Dixie by Hank Williams and Gretchen Wilson
Drunker then Me by LoneStar

When I finally had a woman who would sing with me I knew I had a keeper as Karaoke and singing is very important to my mental health and attitude. Last night we practiced a few times at home and then went to the Country Club to sing the Ray Charles version of Georgia. We rocked the place man, had them standing up and cheering at the end. We have this one guy who dresses like and sings Elvis so I took my sun glasses for that one. I just put on the shades, closed my eyes and tried to become Ray Charles with Genny singing backup. Our voices blended nicely. It was a great Karaoke night. I figure Obama will have us sing the song at his inauguration party…. Listen to that white boy sing. There is something about singing that just makes you feel good. Ya’ll try it as once you try Karaoke you will never go back to going asleep at 8 on a Friday night. Wonder if Elvis will be there tonight honey?


Art Nalley
Redneck Heritage Network
@2008

Stages of Life (From Caring Deeply about Everything) to not giving a Sh..

I was reading one of my magazines and the story was about the number of women that choose not to have children these days and the amount of pressure placed on them by society. My mind tends to jump all over the place so I soaked it in when the interviewer ask her how she feels about it at 50 that she never had a child.  She said well it used to get kind of oppressive but quite frankly now days I don’t give a shit.

 So my mind jumped into many different paths of thinking with my first thought being,  I wonder how and who was the first person to say …Frankly my dear I don’t give a shit!  I know what it means but how did it start.  I am going to have to do some research on that some day. 

But then my second thought was is it because she is a woman that she does not give a shit or is it just stages of life that we all go through.  In thinking about it, I think stages have a lot to do with it.  For those that can still remember being young you can remember the passion you felt about everything.   There was no room in your mind for I don’t know or I am not certain as you were one hundred percent sure whatever you felt or thought was the right way and no one could tell you any different.  In fact you would spend long hours discussing what you felt was the proper path as you felt it was your obligation to educate the rest of world on the proper path. You are the new generation and you plan to change the world.  This stage has different time spans due to different life experiences but generally I would call it the 18-29 time period of life. 

 I heard Steve Harvey on television say something the other day that really nailed this time period.  One of his guests asks Steve:   I just turned 30, what can expect for myself in my 30’s.  Steve said that is a real easy question to answer as you are going to spend your next decade trying to straighten up what you have messed up in your twenty’s.

The thirties are that time that it starts to soak in that you may have to conform a little. You absolutely hate it but you have grown tired of banging your head against the wall and getting nowhere.  It helps a lot if some of your friends have already conformed and doing much better then you.  So maybe I am going to have to cut this hair and dress and talk more like “the man”.   You start justifying this by saying maybe I can change the world by becoming part of the majority and at least I will eat better.  You most likely have a few kids by now and figuring out that they don’t always respond real well to your new way of parenting that don’t leave a child with “issues”.  So maybe my parents were smarter than I thought?  No way, can’t be.  As you grow you find out there many paths lead to the same designation.  Each stage is very important as without them you would not be ready for the next.  So you are working, working and more working trying to keep up with the Jones and provide a better life for your children. Now right here is a critical point that we often mess up with as we too often think a better life means more things but that is most likely better left to another story.

So then one day you wake up and find yourself 40. That is like concrete block upside the head time.  All the young guns start calling you the old man. Your kids are in or finishing high school and you are not ready to be thought of as the old man yet!  You start thinking; I wonder if I can still do the stuff I did in my early years?  You can still remember it so you don’t want the 20 year old life style full time but a little more fun and less work does sound good. But there are bills to be paid, looking back you have actually done quite well but at the time you feel like a failure as you really didn’t get to where you wanted to be and you are 40, not much time left old boy.  You need to be thinking about doubling down on getting ahead and retirement cause you only got a thousand in the bank.  But you also remember what it was like being the new kid on the block growing up as an Air Force Brat and your kids tell you that you would absolutely ruin their life if you moved them during high school.  So you suck it up and wait.

Then your fifties come and you are starting to get your game together as the kids say.  You start thinking no I am not 20 and I can’t do what the 20 year old can but I have something just a little more important and it is called knowledge. Knowledge can be a lot of fun if you handle it right. I found out from raising kids that sometimes, well most of the time you can’t just tell a young one that the fire is hot they got to touch it themselves to make sure. We as the older group seem to forget that sometimes and become to judgmental when we see folks trying their own way.  We need to go back and re-read our 20 time period again from time to time. 

So what you can’t physically do everything you could do earlier in life, sit back chill and enjoy the game of life.  I was up at the Lakeview Country Club one night for a little Karaoke and went up to the bar to get a beer.  There were a few young bucks up at the bar and one was quite drunk.  I made the mistake of looking at him while I was waiting on the waitress.  He lifts his head and says what is the matter old man?  His two buddies mean while trying to calm him down.  I say nothing, nothing at all just getting a beer.  So he stumbles and gets up and says what about I just kick your ass.  The waitress and bartender move down the bar, his friends are holding him and the waitress hands me a beer.  I said look man I don’t want to fight you just want to have a few beers and sing some Karaoke.   I told him there would not be any fun in it and if it last longer than 30 seconds he was bound to hurt me bad.  

He kind of smiled and said okay.  The tension was broke and they all laughed with one of the kids shaking my hand.  See he just wants to sing Karaoke.  So I turn back to the one that wanted to kick my ass and say can I give you some advice son?   He said yeah go ahead.  I said don’t ever pick a fight with an old man; you would do better with some of these young guys shooting pool.   He says why is that?  The place gets quite and the pool players take a break.   Well it like this, it ain’t like you young bucks fighting where ya’ll tend to jump around and ask the other if they had enough yet.  And old man knows he ain’t got but 30 good seconds to take you completely, one hundred percent out or he is going to take a bad ass whipping.  They ain’t coming out slow they are giving it their all in that first 30 seconds.  They all laugh and I walk to my table.

I had been a supervisor at work for at least 25 years but always remembered how I would wish the boss would just let me try my way.  I especially didn’t like it when they would go off into a meeting to solve my problem and not invite me. How am I going to learn how to solve these problems if I don’t at least hear what they did to solve it? But as a first time supervisor for the first 10 years or so I would solve all my staff’s problems, because after all it is my turn to do it my way.  You find out over time that this is not the correct way to supervise as you become indispensable to the organization and they don’t want to hear that you want some time off.  You need to raise the opinion of your boss that your staff can handle it while you are out.  

So in the 50’s you don’t answer so many questions.  When they come to you with problems you make sure to ask them: What research have you done on this problem? What do you purpose we do to solve it?  You enjoy this as it is fun to hear out different methods to solve a problem.  Sometimes it is the same way you once tried to solve a problem, sometimes it worked sometimes it didn’t.  What harms is going to come to the world if I let them try their way?   Most of the time (with the right questions) they know how to solve it and will work a lot harder toward making it work if it was their idea to begin with. 

You start doing this with your kids and wife also.  Your kids come over and you can tell they want some advice but don’t want to just come right out with it and ask.  By now your kids are young adults have children of their own and all they remember is how opinionated you were when they were growing up and all you are doing now is just sitting there listening with that dumb ass smile on your face.  When they quit talking and look at you, you say well what do you think you should do about that?  Let me tell you right now….they hate that question.  In their eyes it is a lot more fun to disagree with you then to take a chance of failing at something that was their idea.  In fact it was not that long ago my oldest ask me about something and I said, look we have had this discussion several times you know my view and this has been a sore area to discuss so try it your way.  I will just sit over here in the corner and smile. 

Then you have a wife that tends to ask your opinion a lot.  And it is only because of the stages you have been through that you realize she does not really want to hear your viewpoint on the problem, just shut up and listen and agree. In fact Genny made the mistake no to long ago of asking me about something (my viewpoint) while the National News was on.  So I say I hadn’t really thought about it hoping she will drop it.  So she says well what you think?  So I say look I wonder why you ask for my viewpoint on something because as long as I have known you, you have never taken my advice.  You always do it your way, so figure it out!   She says I do to listen to your advice.  Well tell me one time you have actually followed it?   That statement worked as she shut up and I got to finish watching the news.

And now at 59 and with a lot of struggle I am now retired.  I still got my hands in a few things, have some ideas to explore but for the most part I do what I want to do when I want to do it and that is very nice.  If I don’t get around to it today, there is always tomorrow so who really gives a shit.  Looking forward to my 60’s and 70’s because my dad would use as an excuse for not doing something…..Let’s leave that for the kids to worry about..

Art Nalley

Redneck Heritage Network

@2013